18 October 2007

Driving Gripes!

Goobers who think STOP is spelled Y-I-E-L-D, and think YIELD is spelled S-T-O-P.

Goobers who think it's OK to make a left-hand turn on a green light...FROM THE OUTSIDE LANE on a 4 lane road. In front of traffic.

Previous Goober's other brother Goober who thinks it's OK to make a right-hand turn out of the LEFT-HAND TURN LANE. At least they're only crossing 2 lanes, now.

Goobers in monster SUV's who come to a complete stop before crossing over parking lot speed bumps.

Their distant cousin Goober Andretti who treats a parking lot as their own, personal Indy 500.

Goobers so wrapped up in their cell phone conversation that they don't notice that they're going 15 MPH under (or 40 MPH OVER) the speed limit.

Goobers who think they're the only one on the road...and drive like it.

Goobers who think that if they tailgate me really, really, closely that I'll speed up.

Goobers who tailgate me closely in order to get me to speed up on a 6 lane road, where the other 2 lanes in our direction are totally empty. PLENTY OF LANES ARE OPEN. PICK ONE THAT I'M NOT USING.

Goobers who decide they need to pull out in front of me, and then go slow. Usually THERE IS NO ONE BEHIND ME AND THEY COULD HAVE WAITED.

Goobers who drive with only their parking lights on at night, or when it's pouring down rain. HEY, GOOBER...YOUR HEADLIGHTS HELP ME TO AVOID HITTING YOUR STUPID ASS CAR.

4 Comments:

At October 22, 2007 1:12 AM, Blogger High Ideals in High Heels said...

I totally agree. I've found most of these "goobers" you speak of, are from Louisiana. This past week end I had an LSU mom flick my room mate and I off because I was in the middle lane and I wasn't speeding up when she tailgated me ( and there was 4 other lanes for her to pass in like you've stated). Never been flicked off by a mom till now.

 
At October 30, 2007 4:39 PM, Blogger I R A Darth Aggie said...

This past week end I had an LSU mom flick my room mate and I off because I was in the middle lane and I wasn't speeding up when she tailgated me ( and there was 4 other lanes for her to pass in like you've stated). Never been flicked off by a mom till now.

I take it that means you've never gone to Red Stick, LA for a night time LSU home game? I attended the TAMU-LSU game back in, 1993?, a night game. I got there early enough to scout out the campus and surrounding area. While driving thru the "student ghetto" area, this little-old grey-haired grandmotherly looking woman notices my TAMU sticker on my car and says

"F*** you, Aggie." Yeah, it was heartfelt.

To quote Johnny Cash "what could I do? what COULD I do?" So I waved and smiled 'cause there was a whole lot of them, and only one of me.

Oy. Must be something in the water.

 
At July 16, 2009 6:14 PM, Blogger dr.alistair said...

i live in canada. nobody flicks anyone here. people just drive slower.

 
At October 19, 2011 4:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trust me, they are everywhere. Usually in front of or around me. Even more when I take the motorcycle.

 

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